Blitzes, Booze and Gentlemen
by bikelock28
Summary: Ever noticed that in 6.10 Blitzgiving, Barney and Robin can't keep their hands off each other? Drabble. T for language and a bit of sex, but not explicit. Please R&R!


Blitzes, Booze and Gentlemen

**Ever noticed that in 6.10 ****_Blitzgiving, _****Barney and Robin can't keep their hands off each other?**

**T for some sex, but nothing explicit. I don't own HIMYM. I hope you enjoy.**

Thanksgiving may have been invented for the Plymouth Pilgrims or something, but as far as Barney's concerned, its main point is to get him laid by the college chicks who go out for a night getting wasted with their friends after their Moms make a snide remark about the weight that they've gained. Barney finds himself doing different things each Thanksgiving; at his Mom's with James- and now Tom and Eli; or with his friends (more recently this involves spending the day in terror of getting slapped); and of course there was that feeding-centre-sidewalk-strip-club crawl. Last year in the aftermath of his break-up with Robin, he spent the night before Slapsgiving at Lily and Marshalls', going clubbing with a Freshman he picked up in MacLaren's, and eventually climbing down the scaffolding on her parents' house at 4am after they both got what they wanted from each other.

This year, after Ted leaves Barney keeps half an eye on the door- two 5s and a 7 enter within the first twenty minutes- but the booze and the laughter with his friends keep coming, and he keeps catching Robin's eye. After the night a couple of weeks ago at the Natural History Museum when they raced around like lunatics, joking and daring each other to do the most outrageous stunts- and later when the security guard told him that Jerome Whittaker was his father not his uncle, and she'd tried to persuade him that maybe that was a mistake, but it wasn't and they both know it, and she'd danced with him and that had made him feel better when everything else seemed to be crumbling…well, there's more between them now than there has been for a while. She gives him a smile when they look at each other over the table- truth be told it's a smile he hates, because she's smiling in pity and comfort and _are-you-sure-you're-okay-?_ And he doesn't _want_ to be pitied or comforted because he _is_ okay. Barney may hate it, but her smile is still doing funny things inside his chest, it's still making him lose focus occasionally on the attractiveness of girls coming into the bar.

Afterwards, Barney's memory of the night is hazy- random things happening in a drunken blur- but he remembers Blitz turning up, ruffling Barney's hair and saying cheerfully, "So these guys are still hanging round with New York's regular Jack Casanova?", slapping him hard on the back and then grabbing a chair at the end of the booth. The top hat appeared from nowhere- and after Lily caught it on her head, Robin was the first person Barney went to to share a celebratory Gentleman-Five with. He has no recollection of how the dog-on-the-skateboard happened- although he remembers every second of Robin laughing in his ear and jumping up and down with her hands on his shoulders. He remembers Zoey showing up, and thinking in great detail about that wax play he'd love to do to her (she probably doesn't get a lot of bedroom fun, with that husband. And Jesus, she's gorgeous. A textbook 9, and there must be some fat ass daddy issues lingering around if she's married to The Captain. Oh yes, he knows every detail of that wax play would go). Somehow they ended up at the apartment, and someone (probably Lily) had flicked the radio on.

"Let's wake Ted up!" he remembers yelling, and then they'd all been dancing crazily together, failing everywhere in the small kitchen. As often happens, he'd ended up beside Robin, holding her waist, snorting with laughter, spinning her under his arms, semi-grinding on each other. Then someone had shouted something about anything and they'd all began to chant- but all he could think is how awesome it would be to watch Zoey and Robin make out, pressing each other up against the fridge, hands wandering all over one another. God, the thought was making him breathless already. Barney had almost been convinced that they were about to really do it, and fumbled for his phone in his pocket (because if anything needs to be captured on camera, it's this)- but then there's a crash as the oven door falls off and Robin stumbles into him, and he's reminded that they were chanting something about dancing on the oven, not- unfortunately –about two smokin' chicks about to suck face with one another.

He remembers Marshall shoving Lily down the hall corridor- she'd barely gone more than a foot, but she'd whooped like she was at Disneyland, and they all agreed that it had been an amazing Thanksgiving-Lily-Slalom Championship.

Somewhere they'd begun a poker game, and Robin had said, "Not again, Barney,"- he'd just laughed and winked at her, and eventually she fell asleep. Zoey got bored of poker and cracked out the face paints (where the hell had they come from? Are they Ted's?), painting Robin to look like Paul Stanley. Every time Barney looked up from his cards he'd seen them so close to each other, Zoey gently stroking paint onto Robin's face, their breaths mingling- and he'd had half a mind to tip the coffee table and the poker cards up, and demand that Zoey and Robin get going on each other right now, while he lies on the couch and watches, and perhaps Marshall can film it for him.

Not long after, they'd cranked up the radio again, but after a couple of songs Lily looked on the verge of passing out (she had supposedly been to 4G earlier, after all) so they'd agreed to call it a night. Marshall and Lily curled up together behind the couch and Zoey traipsed into the bathroom (the others probably found this weird, but Barney can confirm that the bath's porcelain is great for high-quality fabrics like he and Zoey wear).

He'd perched on the arm of the couch- ready to fall asleep at any second, but he'd still found he energy to ask Robin, "Hey, baby, you wanna sleep here tonight?"

"Don't," she had replied between giggles, "Call me that. And no. I'm not stupid,"

"I di'n't mean d'you wanna screw!" he cried defensively, pulling his little-boy-lost eyes on her, "You maybe just wanna sleep on the couch," but he couldn't help adding, "Although, if you ever _do _wanna make this Bangsgiving, I'm always ready to comply,"

She put a hand on his shoulder, "No. Thank. You, Barney. I've got my own room," she'd smiled wickedly, added, "Baby," and pushed him backwards onto the couch, sending his arms and legs sprawling into the air.

He fell asleep that second- and her laughter was the last thing he heard.

**Thanks for your time. Please review, all feedback much appreciated. Have a lovely day, and happy Thanksgiving!**

**PS- If you want more on Barney and Robin in the Natural History Museum, check out chapter 2 of my story ****_Father's Days. _****Thank you.**


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